Misconceptions

So I believe I have been here long enough to be able to point out some of the many things that I had wrong about being in Thailand, whether from reading, talking to someone or simply because it never crossed my mind to think about it.

There are very few bathtubs. Really they only exist is expensive hotels.
Nothing is flat. Seriously, I am really trying to think of a single thing and I am coming up blank.
Sidewalks are...very useful and should never be taken for granted. Especially when so many of the sidewalks are taken up with shack shops, dogs, and motorbikes.
Thai people love, l-o-v-e, LOVE 90's music. But music that is played in public has to be remixes for certain legal reasons so everything is a remix. I have heard some of the strangest remixes that actually make me physically stop, turn, and realize I know the words but everything else about the song is wrong.
You will see the word spaghetti on the menu. It is "Thai style" spaghetti, which means no tomato sauce. And no alfredo sauce.
There is cheese here. It is a cross between cheez-whiz and American cheese.
There is mayonnaise here, but it is not the same substance. Thicker, denser and sweeter.
They may not have potatoes but they have French fries and call them French fries.
You eat with both hands here. That means fork and spoon or chopsticks and soup spoon. It actually works really well.
They only use chopsticks for noodle dishes.
Glasses here are 5" tall with a 2" diameter. Teeny tiny glasses.
Beer is almost always served with ice. And the bottles are 1.5 liters instead of the small 16 to 24 oz ones back in the states.
Most places you will eat outside. Always try to get a seat where you can feel the fan.
Always allow a Thai person to save face, no matter how wrong they are. Good things never come of it otherwise.
7-11s are glorified convenient stores and are found every couple of blocks. They are also 24/7.
You cannot buy alcohol between noon and 2pm and 4-6pm. It is against the law and that is all I know. And if you can't read the sign in Thai that tells you this, people look at you like you are really dumb.
Cigarette packs here have pictures of gum disease and the like that covers 80% of the cartridge. The filters are not as good either.
The meat market will scare you into being a vegetarian.
At night, many of the younger people will get together for group sports. This is really big. Badminton, futsol, skateboarding, dancing and swimming are the top evening sports.
Air con is always a single unit meant for one room. And it comes with a remote.
Wall stickers are huge here. Beats me.
Thai people are very big on leaving the plastic on newly bought items. You will see worn chairs with the plastic still on the legs or art of the armrest.
Cushions are hugely popular and you really learn to appreciate them whether you are sitting on a chair or the floor.
Most bathrooms don't have soap. Some don't even have running water in the sinks, if they have a sink.
The buildings here are colorful. Think Rainbow Row colorful. But the entire nation.
Whenever you go on an elevator, put up an arm to make sure it does not close on you or others. And sometimes the elevator doesn't care if your entire body is in the way.
Scales here can be found outside of 7-11. You put in 1 baht, get on and it announces loudly for everyone on the street what your weight is in Thai.
In 7-11 you don't have to pay for your food to be microwaved.
There are more types of hot dogs than you have ever imagined and they exist in Thailand.
Bugs are everywhere. Deal with it or get out.
However, certain bugs and small animals need to be treated with caution since they could maim or kill you.
The cows here are so bony that if you just look at their faces you would think it was already a skeleton. Creepy.
The buffalo here do not look like the American Bison. And by looking at them, you can understand why "buffalo" is another word for stupid here.
Thai people love taking pictures. Lots and lots and lots of pictures of anything and everything imaginable.
The cross for a hospital or pharmacy is baby blue here.
Most people have motorbikes. Some also have a car, but they still keep their motorbike.
Motorbike here is both motorcycle and scooter. They are practically the same here, except with a scooter, the driver's feet are less on top of the passenger's.
Most Thai people answer the phone with "Hello" even when they don't know English.
Bread, rolls, cakes, croissants, and anything else is almost always full of surprises. Eat with caution. Taro bread isn't half bad though.
There are a lot of roundabouts here.
There are tons of ma and pop stores.
Most shoes are slip on here. And yes, Crocs exist here.
Buses to get to cities within 6 hours of you are cheap.
Thai food is mostly spicy, but there is always sugar in the dishes. The desserts are also sickly sweet, and I love sweet food but it is too much for me.
Many Thais are deathly afraid of the rain (funny, given how most of the year is the rainy season), but that is because a lot of the rain carries sediment.
Many Thai children are afraid of dogs.
It is the Thai way to snack about 11 times a day.
Meals are usually shared and that is totally okay.
Mai pen rai becomes every American's inner struggle.

Okay, that is a decent start. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. And just think of all the things left out! 55.